You’ve heard that saying a million times, right? People are in your life for either a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Pretty comforting little saying when life and relationships are going well. What about when life and relationships are feeling a bit strange, rocky, or uncomfortable? What about when you feel like you have lost someone you thought would be there “forever”? That phrase isn’t much comfort at that moment.
It’s taken me quite a long time to learn to really appreciate the saying. To really examine each part of it, what each part means.
Reason people ~ sometimes these people show up in your life when there is conflict somewhere. To help you learn something, and to help you resolve whatever the conflict is. Even if that conflict is with them. Once you learn the reason, or “get” the lesson being taught, the “reason” people seem to exit your life. Sometimes abruptly without any explanation. Sometimes in a loving, soft way, with communication. Sometimes, they drift away slowly. However they leave, it can be very emotionally painful. What comforts is sitting back, relaxing, and realizing that they were a gift to you, for a specific purpose. Their exit does not mean that the time spent with them was in vain, or wasted. In fact, it was actually a gift for you. Once you have learned the lesson presented, once that person has left, it means you are ready for the next level in life. It’s a “graduation” of sorts. Whether it took 2 days or 20 years for the lesson to be learned, it was a gift. Meant to increase you, not defeat you.
Season people ~ these are a bit tougher to lose, sometimes. In my experience, season people come in like a beautiful wave of wishes coming true. All of a sudden you feel lighter, freer, happier. It seems like these are forever people. Whether it is a friendship, a romantic relationship, or a supremely helpful angel in a dire time of need. When the season is over, these people exit. Usually in a slow, distancing way… but they could also leave abruptly, or surprisingly. Once their season is over, it’s helpful to sit quietly, contemplating how they have enriched and enhanced your life. More often than not, they have imparted strength to you. They’ve given you the gift of perseverance. Maybe even helped you love yourself more, believe in yourself more. Be grateful for the blessing of them… no matter how long they were with you. Be grateful, also, for learning what you were meant to learn while in their company ~ and for being ready now to continue forward with your new gifts. This isn’t a sad time, while you will miss them… it is a “graduation” of sorts.
Lifetime people ~ Ahh. These are wonderful. These may be a combination of all three types of people. Or they may just be gifts to your spirit to walk with you on your journey in this life. These are comforting, loving people. These are special souls that increase your life all the time. Unconditional love, moving and changing with you, encouraging you along the way. Every step. It may be surprising that some of these lifetime folks are not who you might expect. Sometimes certain family members will drift away from you, but a friend will remain all your life. It might be tough to distinguish between a lifetime person, and a season person, since season people can be around for decades. But if you open up your heart and intuition, you will know.
Whoever the people are, whether they are reason people, season people, or lifetime people ~ they are all gifts. They are all blessings. So when a reason or season person exits… allow yourself time to really feel your feelings, to be sad, cry, and grieve. Just don’t stay in that despair. Find the fastest way to gratitude and joy. Staying in despair keeps your door closed. Realizing and saying “thank you” for the lessons you’ve learned will open the door to abundant blessings rushing into your life. Go with the flow. It’s not punishment. It’s universal love.
Here’s the vlog that goes with today’s post… thank you for bearing with me while I learn the ways of “YouTubing” (;